Raw and Uncooked

my dear friend, A.G., forwarded a most poignant, exceptional essay written by her friend in Portland. after reading it, i sent a reply and copied a select group. A.G. urged me to post the email unedited "raw and uncooked." so here it is:

recently, i have been bashing a certain segment of martha-stewarty-hyper-local-hipstery-used-to-live-in-brooklyn-homemadebabyfood-to-homegrown-veggie-CSA-loving mothers.

every year, Esposo asks if we are going to do a CSA and i say the same thing. "doing the best i can to make meals the kids will eat.  i am NOT cooking kale and beets. and you don't cook."

at a farmers market last saturday i requested Esposo to purchase tomatoes and corn -- both for kids. that's it. and also to please not pick up veggies that look good because i will not be making them. the irony of writing that we were at a farmers market is not lost....said market is across from my saturday AA meeting. lots of people with dogs. lots of beards. lots of $15 honey. my kids have been twice and both times got bright blue slushies.

last week Esposo brought home squash and zucchini from some asshole at work who has a garden. i did not cook it and asked him to stop bringing it home. a day later he brought home a GIGANTIC phallic zucchini. before i could throw out a WTF? he said it was left in his cubicle. we are talking the size veggie that wins a prize at a state fair. gave it to a neighbor.

i needed to read this...Why I Hate Food. A Polemic by Mary Rechner and you do, too.
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in response to the above email, my cousin told me about a friend of a friend of his in Portland that raises rabbits to eat.  he and my aunt have talked about the trend of urban farming.  she says: "As much as I love home grown vegetables, I have no interest in doing that.  I know all too well the work involved after growing up working in a garden.  It is not romantic to me." and my momma: "Under the influence of the back to the earth movement of the 70’s ,I made my own yogurt and ricotta cheese." i remember this phase all too well. i was sent to montessori school with peanut butter and rice cake sandwiches and was not allowed to have the cereal i saw on commercials during saturday morning cartoons.

Rechner writes: Women are especially good at judging one another and ourselves. Food has always been the woman’s purview; the woman of the house has traditionally decided when and what to eat. And eat we must. Is your food delicious? Does it satisfy? To that we now add, is your food at all times optimally healthy for your family and for the planet? No pressure!

and under full disclosure, about 90% of my shopping is done at whole foods and trader joes. i try to buy locally-grown produce. my kids consume vast quantities of fruit and love edamame. they also consume vast amounts of sugar that i am sometimes okay and sometimes not okay with...even writing this disclosure is evidence of how immersed this food business is in my conscious. "look! i can write a snarky email about my kids drinking slushies at a farmer's market because i/we know they mostly eat organic and i am way better than all those mothers who buy their kids lunchables and diet cokes." yes, i am damn good at judging others and myself.

as A.G. jokingly said, "it's as if to be a fully evolved woman, i have to return to my European peasant roots." for me this would mean reverting back to my Southern Delta sharecropper roots.

Rechner said, "I fear the damage to a generation of women who are tending (and butchering) rabbits and chickens, and raising vegetable gardens (often along with children) has already been done...The rise of civilization was made possible in part by the division of labor, which in turn made art and literary production possible. If some people grew and procured food, others could spend time doing other things, among them writing and sculpting."

my time not spent tending to a garden or maintaining a compost is not spent painting or writing poetry. it is spent tending to my intellectual curiosity by devouring books and movies. it is spent maintaining the many meaningful friendships that are critical to my sanity and serenity.

the bulk of my time is spent trying to get my babies to eat ANYTHING on many days. to chew with their mouths closed and to use utensils properly while consuming SOMETHING for supper. to not bicker constantly. to try to teach them to be kind and considerate. hell, to not scream at each other or to demand another drink of water but to ask politely for one. better yet, to get it themselves. these are the things taking up most of my time these last few days before school starts. this weekend, however, a little time will certainly be devoted to what i'll be packing in Fella's lunch.